Meet Sonia's Family

Sonia M. is a licensed foster care provider. Today she is something more: an adoptive mother.

In 1995, Casey Family Services asked Sonia if she would be able to care for four children: three sisters and their brother. Sibling groups are normally difficult to place together. Other attempts to find a suitable foster home had not been successful, but Casey was determined to keep the children together. Sonia listened to Casey Social Worker Mary Harris-Miller's plea and answered, "I'll try."

The three sisters, now ages 5 through 12, have been with Sonia ever since. Their brother has returned to his paternal grandmother, but is still in touch. Following Casey guidelines, Sonia and Mary Harris-Miller had worked with the birth family over the years in the hope that all the children could eventually return home. Family reunification is an important goal of Casey's foster care program. But that was not to be.

Just this year, Sonia and her three girls officially became a "forever family." But with the legalization of the adoption process the need for services and supports did not end.

"I have taken advantage of just about every service that Casey offers," Sonia reflects. "The treatment programs, for example, are particularly helpful because they are designed for children with severe psychological, emotional, physical or behavioral needs.

"I've used Casey's after-school enrichment programs," Sonia continues. "And the respite facilities have proven a godsend. I do need respite. I've taken part in a lot of the foster parenting support groups, and we've had a physician come in and serve as needed as a liaison with the birth parents."

For Sonia, knowing that the Casey support team and the services would always be there for her made a huge difference in her decision to adopt. "I'm a single parent," she explains. "If the services Casey provides were not extended to me once I had adopted the children, I know that I could not adequately take care of these kids. The children need tutorial sessions and a counselor; I could not afford those services on my own," Sonia continues. "Sometimes the medical bills are astronomical. It is so important for families like ours to know we can find help when we need it. The average person cannot cope with their needs by themselves.

"It was Casey that brought us together," she adds. "It's Casey that supports us and keeps reinforcing that support. We think of the social workers as part of our family. We eat together. We laugh together. We cry together. We work out problems together."

Mary Harris-Miller recalls that it was "amazing" to have a parent who could take on the responsibility of parenting four children, all with acute special needs. At the time their ages ranged from three months to seven years. "We have been very excited about her commitment to these children as a foster parent all through the years, and now she has really come forth and made herself available to be their adopted, permanent parent," Mary observes.

Her colleague, Casey Social Worker Nora Bradley adds, "It's also been very significant that Sonia's been very willing and available to partner with the children's birth family - to include them in the parenting process. She's clearly the parent, but she's really very open to sharing an open adoption arrangement so that the children have a connection with their birth family.

The strength of families like Sonia's and what they bring to the lives of children who need a permanent home is a constant source of reaffirmation for all who work in Casey's Post-Adoption Services Program.

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